Sunday, January 11, 2009
A deeper salvation
After my last post, I had a lot of feedback on my new understanding of Christ. I realize now that my wording might have led some to believe that I was never saved to begin with, but this is not what I meant. Sometimes I think that we get so caught up in what it means to be a "Christian" that we forget how to have a relationship with Jesus. I have believed in God for as long as I can remember, but I've spent so much of my life trying to conform into what I think I need to be that I've never focused on what Christ wants me to be. And not that I was never saved to begin with, but just that I have been walking a spiritual journey for the past 20 years and, recently, reached a very pivotal moment in my walk with God. I thought I knew what salvation was but I now see how immature my previous understanding really was. It's kind of like my relationship with my husband. Seven years ago, at the beginning of our marriage, I loved him as deeply as I thought I ever could. But as time has gone on and the memories we have together have compounded, I now see how much deeper my love for him is. It's not that I didn't love him in the beginning, it's just that I didn't know him deeply enough to love him as much as I do now. That's what I have experienced lately with Christ. I thought I knew what it meant to be a Christian and to be a child of God, but I only now realize the true definition of salvation. And my understanding is so much deeper than it once was and all of the doubts I used to have have faded into the background as Christ has come center stage. I know where I am going one day, I know where my future rests, I know the home I get to enter into when my time on this earth is done. And whether that means I've just now discovered salvation or just found a deeper meaning to my previous understanding of salvation, I'm really not sure. And I don't think it really matters as long as you know your Savior. After all, I think a relationship with Christ should be one that constantly changes and grows as time passes. I'd like to think that the day we reach a full understanding of Jesus is the day we're standing before Him on the throne. And until that day comes, I hope to always be blown away by His presence, mercy and love. Salvation doesn't begin and end the day you accept Christ into your heart, it's a journey that lasts a lifetime and I can't wait to take the next step.