Sunday, January 11, 2009

A deeper salvation

After my last post, I had a lot of feedback on my new understanding of Christ. I realize now that my wording might have led some to believe that I was never saved to begin with, but this is not what I meant. Sometimes I think that we get so caught up in what it means to be a "Christian" that we forget how to have a relationship with Jesus. I have believed in God for as long as I can remember, but I've spent so much of my life trying to conform into what I think I need to be that I've never focused on what Christ wants me to be. And not that I was never saved to begin with, but just that I have been walking a spiritual journey for the past 20 years and, recently, reached a very pivotal moment in my walk with God. I thought I knew what salvation was but I now see how immature my previous understanding really was. It's kind of like my relationship with my husband. Seven years ago, at the beginning of our marriage, I loved him as deeply as I thought I ever could. But as time has gone on and the memories we have together have compounded, I now see how much deeper my love for him is. It's not that I didn't love him in the beginning, it's just that I didn't know him deeply enough to love him as much as I do now. That's what I have experienced lately with Christ. I thought I knew what it meant to be a Christian and to be a child of God, but I only now realize the true definition of salvation. And my understanding is so much deeper than it once was and all of the doubts I used to have have faded into the background as Christ has come center stage. I know where I am going one day, I know where my future rests, I know the home I get to enter into when my time on this earth is done. And whether that means I've just now discovered salvation or just found a deeper meaning to my previous understanding of salvation, I'm really not sure. And I don't think it really matters as long as you know your Savior. After all, I think a relationship with Christ should be one that constantly changes and grows as time passes. I'd like to think that the day we reach a full understanding of Jesus is the day we're standing before Him on the throne. And until that day comes, I hope to always be blown away by His presence, mercy and love. Salvation doesn't begin and end the day you accept Christ into your heart, it's a journey that lasts a lifetime and I can't wait to take the next step.

2 comments:

Rachel said...

I totally get what you're saying. There's such a huge difference between being a Christian and living with Jesus. The relationship part just blows away the "Christianity" part. I remember my "moment" like it was yesterday. You communicated yours beautifully!

Reggie said...

I have come to realize that there are levels of intimacy with the Father. I am beginning to have more "moments" where His spirit breaks through. It's awesome and yet overwhelming.

Mainstream Christianity has taught us that there is a transaction that occurs and everything is somehow different afterwards. I'm not sure if that accurately conveys the relationship we have with Him. It cheapens it and then we try to systemize the journey to make sense out of what we don't understand.

In my opinion, if you are God's child you really always belonged to Him. There may have been a moment in time where you accepted it but from His vantage point there was never any doubt. So all experiences on this journey are valid and should be part of an ever increasing closeness through His Spirit.